Sir wants to apply for a three-day work-related injury leave.
I don’t know where I got the courage. I bought three tickets for Valentine’s Day at one go yesterday.
I knew it would rot.
But it’s rotten enough to make people have a myocardial infarction, and Sir didn’t expect it …
Valentine’s day, valentine’s day.
You’re a lover, Du Jie.
01
You really don’t know which one is the worst until you see the end.
Let’s start with the good-I really want to go to your world and love you.
The so-called "good".
It means that it is the most promising film to break through 5 points in Valentine’s Day files.
Valentine’s Day special fantasy sketch.
Zhou Yiran, the heroine, is very charming in "The Sky of Wind Dog Boys".
Shi Baiyu, the male actor, is the worst in the whole play, Mo Junjie.
Settings in this film, popular version of Sense8:
People living in different countries have the same senses.
One is Anyi (Zhou Yiran), a female architect in China, and the other is Gao Gao, a pianist in Germany (Shi Baiyu).
Thousands of miles of marriage is a thread, because the brain waves are connected and become tell it to the judge in different places.
If there are some jokes in the first half of the film, such as the gender dislocation that this kind of theme will definitely not let go.
Then the second half, more and more people were on pins and needles.
How does the hostess have love for people who only appear in her mind and have never met?
When the hostess was strongly kissed by the boss, he used synaesthesia to help the hostess slap the boss.
The hostess was sexually harassed in the workplace, and he used his musical skills to help her out.
So the woman felt:
He used to be a nice guy.
He cares about me.
But how can a "good man" become a "lover"? We can’t see the chemical reaction of love, only the ripening of industrial saccharin.
Finally, the "truth" was exposed, and it was forcibly turned into industrial tears.
There is another reason to say that I really want to go to your world and love you is the "best" valentine’s day file:
At least … It’s not unlucky. (This requirement is also humble to have no temper)
Yes, this is the only movie on Valentine’s Day this year with no dead people.
It’s not that romantic films can’t shoot tragedies or make sacrifices.
The protagonist takes the box lunch without any preparation and logic, which won’t give people any feeling of tears. After watching the big festival, you just want to shout:
Since they all belong to Amway movies that you can give to whoever you hate.
Sir doesn’t shy away from what’s bad.
Don’t forget I love you.
The concept probably came from Memento.
Male host Lu Yao (Jasper Liu), an amnesiac, has only one day’s memory, but he forgets it the next day after sleeping.
Xu Xingyue (Gulnazar), the female host, is the psychotherapist of the male host.
Doctors and patients, after several courses of treatment, were treated on the sheets …
We can’t tell how we fell in love.
Anyway, the plot can be summed up in one sentence: I can’t make it up, just be forced and cry for me.
Establish a relationship, and then be misunderstood by the male host and sister.
Cry first.
Clear up the misunderstanding together, and the screenwriter refused.
Suddenly, the woman was pregnant unexpectedly, and the man was afraid to have children because of his own situation, so they quarreled.
Cry a wave.
Finally decided to have children, and happily bought baby products to welcome the arrival of a little baby.
How can this work?
With a thud, the woman was a precursor to eclampsia, bleeding heavily and died.
The whole play is over.
? ? ?
In this story, it’s not good to buy paper money for ancestors for 50 yuan, and what movie tickets to buy.
(Of course, it may also be that the pattern of Sir is small. Maybe people are public service advertisements to remind Valentine’s Day to take insurance measures. )
Just out of the cinema, I thought my bad luck was over.
I didn’t expect "ten years of one product as warm as words" to come.
How ugly is it?
Yesterday, the topic rushed to the top of the list.
Today, the watercress opened at 2.9, still falling.
Leading the Valentine’s Day box office, adapted from the novel of the same name published by Shu Haicang eleven years ago.
It is indeed an ancient story that will explode eleven years ago.
She, Wenny (Ren Min), a beauty in the south of the Yangtze River, is the daughter of the Wen family who was lost outside.
Returning to the extended family, he was repeatedly rejected.
He, Dj Yan (Ding Yuxi), a handsome boy in Beijing, is a son of a noble family and is a family friend of the Wen family.
I love photography, but I always guard her.
Wenny, a transfer student, was bullied and he stood up for her; Parents’ meeting, she is "an unwanted wild child" and he is her parent.
He gave her a home.
Together, they raise a stray dog, a bear who looks like a model and is "abandoned", to accompany her and warm her heart.
It’s romantic to watch the sea in summer and the snow in winter without reading.
However, if you are bored every day, won’t it reflect the role of screenwriters?
I have to give you some drama.
Then everything should have happened to these two.
The man was taken to America by his parents, and his mother was unhappy in marriage and jumped off the building.
After he witnessed all this, PTSD died and was locked up in an American mental hospital.
The key is whether the man is alive or not and not telling the woman.
The woman’s side is abused by one person.
"One product in ten years", we have not been together for seven years.
They met again in the tenth year, thud.
The man is terminally ill.
So the hostess gave him a never-ending wedding and accompanied him to death.
You don’t know what the festival has done to see this.
All the plots are not connected, and they all rely on narration +PPT transition.
Then pick some bold and highlighted golden sentences from the original-"Unless there are white bones in the loess, I will keep you safe for a hundred years."
Dream back to the QQ space ten years ago.
After reading these, Sir really doesn’t know whether to sympathize with the lovers in the cinema.
I still feel sorry for myself after watching three bad movies.
02
Valentine’s day file, rightfully bad.
Bad movies are mostly publicized in advance.
For example, the title of a film that you are too lazy to finish reading.
Ten years is as warm as words, Don’t forget that I love you, I really want to go to your world and love you.
I don’t know what they are talking about, and the title goes straight to 9 words.
Silly posters that can’t be separated.
Sticking on a big head, staring, snuggling, hugging and kissing.
Of course, the most obvious sign is the release of Valentine’s Day.
What good film can this be?
On Valentine’s Day, three romantic films cut down about 250 million box office.
"Ten Years of Temperament" also pushed "Watergate Bridge" out of the Japanese championship.
But after a day, they were all beaten back to their original shape.
"A Ten-Year Taste as Warm as a Word" was 143 million at the box office yesterday and 12.95 million today, a decrease of 90.9%.
A real one-night stand.
In addition to the Valentine’s Day file, include the "Pan-Valentine’s Day file":
3.14 white day, May 20th, Qixi, Christmas and New Year’s Eve.
What do those "love films" tailored for couples look like?
Valentine’s Day 2018 "Love One-way Train" has no score, and "First Love Shallow Rules" is 3.1.
In 2019, seal it with a kiss was 4.4, Love in Blue was 2.8, and Love in Fifty Meters was 5.0.
In 2020, due to the vacancy of the epidemic, last year’s "Don’t be a gentleman and a good lady" and "I applaud you" were not scored.
Take "seal it with a kiss", the best box office, as an example, it was also a "one-night stand", and the box office fell off the cliff the next day.
Because if it wasn’t for finding a place to date.
No one can walk into the cinema for such a movie.
The film is adapted from Japanese Man’s Naughty Little Kiss, and belongs to the same IP as the high-scoring Taiwanese drama "The Kiss of Pranks".
In 19 years, the ancient setting of Xueba Handsome Boy VS Stupid Sunshine Girl has long passed.
In the meeting scene, the two still walk without looking at the road.
One bump, two pulls, three kisses.
Idol drama, choose actors and watch CP sense.
Darren Wang plays Jiang Zhishu, Jelly Lin plays Yuan Xiangqin, Excuse me?
The filter is thick, the skin is white, and the makeup is exquisite.
That kind of heart-pounding feeling is also like doping too many additives, leaving only haze and blockage.
Actually.
Valentine’s day stalls are like scenic meals, and it is impossible not to taste bad.
Slaughter is the door-to-door. There is no choice.
What I earned was this hammer deal, and I decided that there would be no next time.
At this time, does it matter whether there is love in a romantic film?
All we need is a cover for a romantic film, and then Jiang Taigong will go fishing, and those who wish will take the bait.
03
If love must be tested, then Valentine’s Day is a test.
What is more cruel than a romantic film without love.
It must make you emotional.
Have you found that in recent years, there have been fewer romantic sketches and more tear gas?
"Former 3" made many viewers cry into tears, with a box office of 1.941 billion, a small explosion in that year.
Inside, the man cos is the supreme treasure in the street, and the woman knows that she is allergic and wants to eat mango’s self-abuse plot, which is to poke hard at the tears.
The Story More Sad than Sadness, with its rigid copy of the old be aesthetics, still won 958 million box office.
Crying has become a big selling point of romantic films.
It not only caters to young people with daily emo, but also conforms to the sad and greasy nostalgia of middle-aged people for youth.
Many movies are invited from posters. Come and cry.
On My Love, of course I want to cry if I can’t love it.
"I want us to be together", regardless of men and women, cry for me.
In this year’s Valentine’s Day file, it is the MV-style crying drama award.
Ren Min’s acting skills are ok, so the director let her cry all the time without any change.
If we used to dislike the cheapness of tears such as "Ex-3" and "A Story More Sad than Sadness".
So now these, even crying can’t shed tears.
This year’s Valentine’s Day file not only blasphemes love.
Even profaned the cliche.
Because they don’t even bother to explain a cliche love story.
Can’t shoot the sweetness of love, can’t shoot the romance of love, just want to add a little industrial mustard, and want the audience to drop a few tears.
It seems that you are emotional and have a feeling of love.
So in this year’s Valentine’s Day file, we finally saw the paranoia of domestic romantic films about be, to the extent of being possessed.
The plot is illogical.
Emotion has no foundation.
The protagonist dies for you for no reason, and it’s not true love to talk about being in love and not dying.
As a result, there is no love, only bad luck.
Valentine’s Day, when did it end up like this?
You know, on Valentine’s Day in 2017, we obviously watched la la land in the cinema.
A song "Another day of Sun" opened the curtain of "city of angels".
The highway at 28℃ is hot and boiling.
Gorgeous dresses and skirts are flying, busy life and restless dreams are burning your eyes.
The seasons of winter, spring, summer, autumn and winter change.
Corresponding to the five stages of Mia and Sebastian’s acquaintance, love, breakup, indifference and looking back.
Nothing else.
Is beauty.
Is endless love.
Sir can’t help taking it out to wash his eyes every year.
If you really can’t make a romantic movie.
Then don’t make new movies in the future Valentine’s Day files.
Let’s watch old movies, which are quite romantic.
No matter it is a masterpiece of word of mouth that will be shown soon.
It is also an unshakable classic of film history.
Compared with meeting a new doomed love.
Why don’t we continue to be warm in the story of our hearts.
Forgot the valentine’s day file.
Remember, we really had love.
The picture in this article comes from the Internet.
Editor’s Assistant: North of Xibei
